Just can't say Goodbye
by CSIflea
Summary: Saying goodbye is the hardest thing to do


**Here's the edited version. I had to remove the lyrics due to a group that told me if I didn't they would report me. Anyway, it's more or less the same, just a few changes here and there. Let me know what you think…**

It's funny how memories comes to the surface when you least expect it. Here he was, standing in a place he didn't want to be and they just kept coming. The strange thing was, his memories took him to a place where he didn't want to be either. Nick closed his eyes and remembered a gun in his face, many, many years ago. He also remembered the calm voice that saved him. His eyes flew open, he wanted to hear that voice now, and he didn't want to be here. Closing his eyes again, Nick was mentally transported to another place he didn't want to be. He was back in that coffin, being slowly suffocated to death; until Nick looked up into deep blue eyes, that reassured him that he was safe, that he would be all right.

There are different kinds of love. Catherine knew that she loved Eddie back then, but the love she had for her best friend was different- it was special. Not romantic, just special. They'd been friends for almost 20 years; Catherine couldn't help but have a place in her heart for the man that meant so much to her and Lindsey. He had stood up for her with Eddie back then, helped out where he could, but most of all he protected her. Catherine knew that she never had to worry because he watched out for her as much as he could, and no matter what, he always would.

Greg went from lab tech to CSI and the best time in his life was being able to stand next to the man he had admired for years. The day he had found out that he was going out into the field was amazing. He was going to be trained by the best of the best, by a legend. Greg felt like no one could touch him. Standing there, next to _the legend_, he felt like he was walking on clouds. Like he flew with greatness.

Brass always thought of himself as a good man. Then he met the geeky, straightforward, quote-spouting, bug-loving scientist. Even with very little social skills, he was the better man. He had shown Brass, over and over, the meaning behind compassion. He was better at being supervisor than Brass could ever be. The people under him, respected him and he treated them with respect.

The loyalty and absolute passion he had awed everyone with whom he came in contact, but there were very few people who knew the real man behind the glasses and messy desk. Brass was fortunate to be one of them.

Al would never, could never forget the rat-hunt in the dark morgue. He wasn't even ashamed to admit he almost screamed like a girl! Still, he couldn't remember having more fun than that night, while he and his friend went rat-hunting. Even Al's dry jokes were appreciated by the scientist. But he had to stay strong, he couldn't cry. His friend wouldn't want that and for that reason and that reason only, Dr Al Robbins would fight the urge.

Everyone remained silent; a person could almost feel the emotion in the air. One person in particular looked like the world had just ended. The brown haired woman's eyes were red and puffy. No matter how much Sara thought about moving on, the more she realized she couldn't - no, she wouldn't move on. Not without the love of her life- it just didn't feel right. She sat on the chair, trying in vain to stop the tears from cascading down her cheeks like a waterfall. She still felt his warmth, but not next to her, where she needed it the most- the feeling came from inside her instead. It was coming from his baby inside her.

Hodges and Archie, Wendy and Henry, David and Judy, they all were there. All the lab techs were too. They were shocked. It was unthinkable. The burden to say goodbye was just too great, they couldn't say goodbye.

Even Ecklie was there, shedding a tear or two. The man may have been a royal pain, he thought, but he was a good man, an honest man. They seemed to be getting along better recently. Conrad wouldn't say goodbye, he just couldn't.

It is said that what you need will come when you need it, not when you want it. Warrick had heard the saying somewhere and it kind of stuck. Now he wondered if the same applied to family. Warrick had never known his father, but he'd found a father in an unexpected person. The best CSI became the father figure he so desperately needed. Even through Warrick's gambling problem, the man wouldn't give up. He helped Warrick, protected him, and showed him how to be a better person.

They were known as the Four Musketeers. Now they had lost a member. The remaining three would go on, but they held on to the belief that their friend would be with them- always.

Warrick, Nick and Greg had found a common father, who guided them, encouraged them to become the best they could be, but most of all, one who accepted them for who they were.

Brass and Al walked by Catherine's side as they left the cemetery. Three friends, three musketeers against the world, and they would make it, together, just not today.

Sara took a deep breath, silently promising her baby that she would carry on, no matter how hard it seemed. She felt her friends behind her and knew that, even if it was not today or tomorrow, she would make it.

The three young men made a vow. They would use the knowledge and wisdom given to them, to help others and in that way carry on the legacy of Gil Grissom.

_Gilbert Grissom_

_1957 - 2013_

_Loving Husband, Father and Friend_

_Always in our hearts_

_Forever in our memories_

_Never to be forgotten._

**A/N - I hope you enjoy this one. Sorry it was so sad, but that's what the muse came up with. Thanks to ILoveJorja and C. Nicole for the beta work. **

***Story inspired by 'Too hard to say goodbye' by Westlife**


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